Posts Tagged ‘Wedding Favors’
Two Wedding Customs I Could Do Without
You have spared no expense in the planning of your wedding. The candle wedding favors are all lit and everyone is still drying the tears from their eyes. You have thanked everyone for coming. You have paid the band and shook hands with all two hundred plus guests, pretending to remember all of them. Everyone has thanked you for the elegant wedding favors and commented on how beautiful the bride is. The ushers are bringing cars around and it is finally winding down. Now it is time for the night you have been waiting on for your entire life. Romantic candles, soft music, and a chilled bottle of wine await you, your new wife, and her mother.
Everything comes to a screeching halt. Did I just say that her mother would be spending the night with you and your bride on your wedding night? Well, you think to yourself, I guess we could make up the spare bedroom. Wrong again, because your mother in law will be in the bedroom with you. Now you know I must be either drunk as a skunk, or crazy as a loon. Well you are wrong on both counts. I am describing a wedding custom of several villages in Africa. In all complete seriousness, there are tribes who have a custom that the bride’s mother, your mother in law must spend the night with the newly married couple and it gets worse. Her job is to make sure that your new wife knows what to do to make you happy…in bed.
It does not have to be the bride’s mother. In certain situations, it can be the groom’s mother or in lack of a bride or groom’s mother, a female village elder. They literally sit there and direct the bride what to do and watch to make sure she does it right. To make things worse, if your wife does something too well, the watcher will report to the village elders that she was not a virgin and the wedding will be annulled. Talk about some strict rules. You have to hope that your new bride is not a natural at sex or you could lose her.
In another small village near Borneo, there is a wedding custom for which I just do not think I would have the stomach. During the first 72 hours after the wedding, in order to avoid bad luck, the newly married couple is not allowed to urinate or have a bowel movement. In order to ensure they do not cheat, the couple is watched day and night. They can only have small sips of water and a few bites of food every now and then. I do not know about anyone else, but I cannot go 72 hours without peeing even if my life depended on it. Shoot, at my age, I am lucky if I can get through a two-hour movie without relieving myself. In fact, I do not go to the movies because of this, choosing instead to wait for the DVD release of the film. Making it through one night without going to the can would be hard enough and they want me to go for three nights? My bladder would burst.
These weird wedding traditions are pretty strange but they are steeped deeply in the traditions of these customs and are lovingly followed to the letter in most cases. I just cannot imagine how embarrassed I would be to have my mother in law standing over my wedding bed directing traffic. I think it would be even worse if it were my mother doing it.
Aaron Hu has authored on an extensive range of topics related to the wedding industry. If you are looking for Candle Wedding Favors, E-WeddingFavors.com has the biggest selection available. You will also find Wedding Guest Favors and much more, all at very affordable prices.
The Wedding Veil Has Symbolic Meaning
The symbol of the wedding veil has been permanently tied to a tradition that the bride and groom not see each other the day of the wedding. The tradition holds that it is bad luck. The symbol of the bride’s veil is actually part of the old traditions when marriages were prearranged, often before they were even born. The bride would be kept away from the groom for her entire life. On the day they were to be married, she would wear a veil so that her face is not revealed until after they have been legally declared as husband and wife. This is so the groom will not see the bride and possibly change his mind. While this custom was terribly degrading for the bride, it was not customary to tell women how beautiful they are and not buildup their esteem. It was just another form of repression in those cultures.
There is another culture in Eastern Europe that is steeped in the people’s superstitions. The people of old were terribly frightened of demons and evil spirits. It is said that these evil spirits would be jealous of a newly married couples attempt at happiness through marriage. Spirits cannot do what the living do and it makes them extremely angry. The bride would be veiled from the moment she arose on the day of her wedding. The veils back then were huge, billowy, and much thicker than today’s sheer fabrics. She would eat, dress, and do everything disguised under her veil so that evil spirits could not recognize her and torment her before she could be married. The veil was only lifted after they were married and therefore protected by her husband and by God.
The wedding veil was also said to be the funeral shroud. For this reason, a woman would make the veil before she was married. It was long enough to wrap her body in on the day of her death. This would prevent the evil spirits from recognizing her as she crossed from this world to the next. Women lived in great fear in those days and while this sounds morbid, a woman’s veil turned shroud was of great comfort to her. When I girl was old enough to sew, she would begin making her veil with the help of her mother or grandmother. By the time she was married, it would be long enough to serve both purposes.
Another symbol and tradition was that the wedding veil was supplied by the husband. It is what he used to capture is bride. The groom would pick the woman he wanted and sneak up on her, throwing the veil over her and carrying her away. She wore it until after she was married so that no one would recognize and attempt to rescue her.
The wedding veil and the wedding kiss are also tied together in symbolism. The wedding veil is pushed back after they are pronounced man and wife but in some places, this did not conclude the service. The bride and the groom had to then consent to a kiss before it was legal. Since the bride could not see her husband very well and in some cases, the husband never saw the bride until he lifted the veil, it was a moment of extreme anxiety as to whether they would both consent to the kiss. It was very often the happiest or saddest moment of the entire affair. The wedding gifts were often money in those days and the groom would be counting on the monetary gain. He would also be out any wedding accessories he would have had to purchase up to this point. That means that it was a more crucial moment for the groom than for anyone else.
Aaron Hu has authored on an extensive range of topics related to the wedding industry. If you are looking for Wedding gifts, E-WeddingFavors.com has the biggest selection available. You will also find Unique Wedding Favors and much more, all at very affordable prices.